Confused

I started Hiking. But why? What happened to me? I am typical person and I find me very complex while I start discovering self. I understand all but can’t behave like that and used to like compromise from the other side. I like to win. I am stubborn. I find me Lazy sometime. I am not expressive. I am attention-seek. I don’t like lies and don’t like to break rules. I respect others. I am #heforshe. I am jealous for people qualifying for selected categories in my mind. I am soft-minded. I cry a lot when alone. MY anger has limits but it comes very fast but i control it. I will not leave anything so easily. I have fear that I am not as much intelligent as I am getting. But sometimes I feel it when I compare that I am something means I can do something so I am here. My perplexed mind says me to become Radical. I like to talk to people Online but when they are Live I am mute until they start. If i will be activated I will do appreciable work. I can think well. I feel guilty very well without reason sometimes. I can’t talk with eye-contact many-times. Though I think I am good. I am very sensitive. I do many works when I am excited about that thought but i will feel guilty afterwards. I am trying to become simple one. I like to be entrepreneur. Sometimes I think that Why I am here. What if I will die. What will do more to this world. What’s the purpose? I crawl with family members many times and then realize my mistake but I hesitate to say sorry. I am judgemental sometimes. I can’t find what’s good and what’s bad in close relations or My thinking about good and bad is not necessary. Before One I was searching the definition of Love but I got that when I thought my life without my mother(sorry mom). Actually It shows me blank. Sometimes I think I am psycho

I think about this all and my head start to spin and I just go for Hike

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